Was once again thinking about what I am doing here in the states, and the title of my blog shouted out to me that at that time, about me seeking breakthroughs in my life.
and i realised, maybe, that's the reason I'm here.
breakthrough #1.
3 years ago I tried working at swenson's T2. My first job, I was ever so excited about working in the airport and getting to serve ice cream
But waitressing was so physically demanding and taxing on my socialising skills, not forgetting the miserable pay, and the promise of an office job that paid almost 3 times as much
Rongs left after 5 days, I left after 7.
I swore off waitressing
And here I am right now, working in Foods for 10 weeks.
breakthrough #2.
biology has always been one of my least favourite, when i was way younger, i refused to come into any contact with plants, i never knew how to appreciate flowers, all my life i totally HATE worms (and insects).
And here I am right now, working in Landscaping, doing watering, weeding, digging my fingers into the soil and getting my nails and skin all dirty and cui, seeing long gross earthworms and screaming every single time.
breakthrough #3.
all these years, because of the various family issues that were present even before i was born, i've always been closer to my aunts and cousins rather than my own parents. things improved over the years, as i grow older and start to see for myself that they do love me and constantly remind myself that it is God's commandment that I should honor my father and mother.
right here in the states 23h away from home,
for the first time in my life, i really really miss my family
for the first time in my life, i looked forward to seeing my mummy, even if it was just a brief meeting (but thank God i managed to spend a whole night with her).
for the first time in my life, i realised that i really love my parents alot after all.
pls God, keep them safe, and together.
breakthrough #4.
i've grown up in a christian environment, but the one time i really really relied on God for strength and comfort was during that transition period in primary school.
the time before i came, i just felt that i was getting comfortable with all i had and much as i was getting more involved in church stuff, there was this lack of spiritual hunger and a constant temptation to look inwardly instead of looking at God.
coming to the states threw me in an environment once again, where i had nobody to rely on, nobody to turn to, nobody but Him. i felt the strong desire to go to church once again, even more than how i felt when i stil had PO.
the desire to feel Him see Him hear Him.
and indeed He's shown me that He's always here.
that because He called me here, He provides.
i experienced what it means to humble myself, admit that i am weak and He is strong.
and im even more in love with Him than ever before.
breakthrough #5.
i guess im just not a very adaptable person. felt so unhappy here initially coz work was really bad and the organisation is just so screwed up i dreaded work so so terribly. it was as though i was thrown there to die on my own.
confessing Colossians 3:23-25 again and again, after coming back from nyc somehow my perspective changed.
frankly im not sure why either.
suddenly i felt the favour that God has given me. from having negative thoughts that the supervisors have something against me, to feeling the recognition and trust, that they can trust me to take care of the whole place from opening to closing.
favour of putting great people around me, like the 2 from entertainment department who make me laugh and happy 3 times a day when they are here to do the shows, and the co-worker who is so motherly and more than willing to help me out as we face the endless queue of customers together over the past weekend.
indeed, when we do everything heartily unto Him, He will bring us through and reward us at the end of the day.
im starting to think that maybe, i'll miss the ppl and the place here after all.
